i saw you in the hospital 
cafe you were 
peering down into your
coffee with no cream and one sugar and 
sobbing.

the cafe was warm it was 
full of chatter and you 
wished you hadn't 
ordered the chicken it was
dry.

there were souls 
everywhere they were 
laughing and coughing it was 
the most congenial cafe
you'd seen. 

alone in this room full 
of furniture and foods and
throw-away lives you stared into 
your coffee and 
cried.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

i saw you outside the 
city library it was way past
closing time you were
just lingering with no where 
to go. 
sucking on an overripe 
lemon you stared 
into the rain and the cars 
the people the buses the buildings took no 
notice. 

an empty 
look on your face you 
yelled for a taxi and seeing none
stepped into a large 
puddle.


i watched you walk drenched
to the west in order to see the 
rising of venus
you didn't even think of 
going home. 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

i saw you in your lover's
arms you sipped her greedily not 
looking anywhere but the ceiling
she cried
out.

the room was lit coldly it 
sat a silent observer
waiting for you 
to leave the empty music 
soared.

clawing you dug for 
something deeper than yourself wanting she 
writhed in her own 
control. 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

i saw you in bed you were
keeping warm in someone else's underwear you 
tossed and turned accidentally 
pushing the book you had been reading off the 
mattress. 


i peered through the window and wondered if you 
felt me watching even in your 
sleep you kept your head far from the 
glass.


                                                            




copyright 1997 Rachael Lee